What’s A Planned Engagement? I had one! Let me tell you…

Engaged couple sitting on couch together and smiling.

By now you know I’m engaged, but did you know I had a “planned engagement”?

There was literally no element of surprise. Like, ZERO...ZILCH...NADA! After being with my man on and off for over 8 years, I was ready to know exactly what was in the cards for us. So we carefully planned the whole thing as our first premarital “project” together.

We kept our initial engagement a secret because I was closing on my house and that was stressful. Joe had asked my parents for my hand in marriage (so old school, I loved it!) over Thanksgiving and we spent the rest of 2021 in bliss, unpacking boxes in our new home. This was the first time since we met that we were actually living together. Can you believe that?

Laying low and keeping our engagement a secret gave us plenty of time to plan a public engagement that included more of our family and friends, and gave us the opportunity to dress up and show up like proper New Yorkers. The video below is the result of all our planning. I gotta say, I'm proud of it. It was a lot of work to orchestrate and it ended up being the most beautiful early spring day in NYC (and the only warm day for a long time until May).

The next video is what you're here for! We talk about how we pulled off a "planned engagement" weekend seamlessly, and discuss everything from what we wore to how much we spent. I mention the vendors we used and all the actions I took to make our weekend easy to navigate for all our family & friends invited to take part.

Joe makes his debut in this video. I actually caught him a little off guard filming it! He was on his way to a birthday party upstate and I pulled him into the video at the last minute because I thought it'd be better for us to tell our story together. He gets a lot of credit from me for participating because being on camera is not his thing. I still like featuring him though! Love you, babe!

My biggest piece of advice for planning an engagement together is open communication.

I shared every detail with Joe every step of the day. He was involved in each decision we made. We picked up the cake together, and divided and conquered on tasks related to preparations. The more I shared, the more he wanted to be part of it. I realize engagements and weddings are sometimes "more for the bride" or for the half of the couple that's really into the celebration side of it all. Joe would've been fine with a low-key engagement but when I communicated my initial vision to him, he got into it and started to add to my vision. My only expectation of him was to be present in the moment we were creating...and we both were!

Here's a link to everyone mentioned in the video, from our jewelry designer to our caterer.

The dress maker and suit rental company are also listed! But if I've left anything out, feel free to inquire and I'll respond back.

Our jewelry designer who made my engagement ring: Hidden Gem Lab

They can source your diamonds/stones, design your ring and more! They're also making my wedding band, which we just finalized the design for!

My dress maker: Bridal & Evening Designer Vira Lilium
Joe's suit rental (mailed directly to you): Generation Tux
Our Photographer: Travis Keyes
Our Videographer: Clair Forrest of Claire Forrest Films
Our Brooklyn-based caterer: Red Table Catering - Ask for David Penna who was a dream to work with!
Our cake maker: BCake NY based in Brooklyn, NY
Our macaron tower maker: MacarOn Café NY - my contact here was Laura Birnbaum and she was phenomenal.